May 30, 2023

Miss Fire: Top 10 Colleges With The Hottest Chicks

Don’t let this be a secret any longer: THE HOTTEST COLLEGE CHICKS ARE ON THE WEST COAST!


Southern-Belles are a real thing, too. But, where do they stack up against the West Coast Hotties?


  • 10. University of Georgia


Athens, Georgia. With a 54% acceptation rate, you can guarantee they won’t accept your high school crush.

Believe it or not, these Hot Dawgs should be higher on this list. They are locked in at #10 on this board.

ENROLLMENT: 28,740 (2018–19)

  • 9. UCLA


With only a 16% acceptance rate, you’ve now found wifey potential when venturing onto the University of California, Los Angeles’ famous campus. These chicks are not only SMOKING hot, they’re also smart. Can you believe that? It DOES exist.

Also, believe it or not, UCLA used to be extremely bad ass in basketball under John Wooden. Fairly decent football program, never been great. The greatest mystery in the history of college basketball right now is that UCLA can not seem to get back to relevancy. After all those championships, the program has taken a steep dive into piss-poordom. At least they have smart hotties to rub their backs after losing by 18 to Stanford.

ENROLLMENT: 30,994 (2018–19)

  • 8. West Virginia University


I know what you’re thinking. How in the hell do a bunch of chicks from West Virginia beat out some California girls on the Best Coast? Relax, let me explain. WVU’s HOTTEST chicks are from Jersey, New York, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh and so on (the hottest ones at least, and there are quite a few). With an acceptance rate of a high 72%, you’ll have your Morgantown Sewer Rats hanging off your shoulder at the local bars. Find the gems, close the deal. You know the drill.

ENROLLMENT: 28,703 (2018–19)

  • 7. Virginia Tech


Honestly, I feel like I am slighting Virginia Tech right here with a #7 ranking. Blacksburg is crawling with hotties. Better yet? ALL OF THEM are smart. Yes, all of them. There isn’t one single dumb female that attends Virginia Tech. So, fellas, if you’re looking to settle down and marry a smoking hot woman, you better wander into Blacksburg, Virginia as fast as you can and try your luck. I mean, these chicks are HOT. They also have a really badass entrance to their home football games.

ENROLLMENT: 27,120 (2018–19)

  • 6. University of Wisconsin, Madison


This is starting to get good. Who would’ve guessed that there are hotties in the MIDWEST? Yes, there are. AND AGAIN, THEY ARE SMART! The University of Wisconsin, Madison is home to the BadGirls. An unbelievably overhyped football and basketball team every year, but the BadGirls make up for it. Jump around, baby.

ENROLLMENT: 32,230 (2018–19)


  • 5. University of Washington



HUSKIES! YES! The University of Washington is home of the HUSKIES! Extremely overhyped football and basketball programs as well. Chris Petersen just stepped down as head football coach. The basketball team started the year ranked inside the top 20 and lost 12 straight games. Just an awful athletic program, but the eye candy is good enough to land the Huskies at #5 on this board. Only 46% acceptance rate as well.

ENROLLMENT: 30,295 (2018–19)

  • 4. Arizona State University 


FORKS. UP. It took me 10 minutes trying to find my favorite picture of the hottest ASU chicks, but I’m baffled. There are so many. It’s a challenge I wish you would bestow upon yourself. Incredible. Herm Edwards is going to win a PAC 12 Championship with the Sun Devils in 2020 and I will be there to celebrate with these dimes when they do so.

ENROLLMENT: 46,181 (2018–19)

  • 3. University of Alabama


Amazing in football. Even hotter chicks. Crimson Tide. Roll Elephant. All that. You’re #3 on this list, Saban. I think the bigger elephant in the room is begging the question: Is Nick Saban DONE at Alabama after a much anticipated 9-3 finish? Does he move on to another gig? I don’t know… But, I DO know this: Alabama has peaked.

ENROLLMENT: 38,387 (2018–19)

  • 2. Florida State University 


I’m sitting here depressed having to accept the fact that these two hotties above (and hundreds more just like them) had to watch a prominent football program be driven by Willie freaking Taggart. No woman on earth that looks this good should have to endure the pain and suffering that they had to. If you’re a 3/10, you didn’t deserve what Willie gave you. Unacceptable. I want to get down to Tallahassee, FL here very soon and apologize to each and every one of you ladies in person. Let’s make arrangements.

ENROLLEMENT: 32,614 (2018–19)



In a league of their own. Absolutely the closest thing you’ll get to Hollywood glamour. BEAUTIFUL girls. Just think for a second about how cool it would be to go to school at USC or UCLA. You live in Los Angeles, amongst the biggest stars in the world, warm weather year round, always something to do everyday, Lakers games, parties like none you’ve ever been to, the list goes on and on. Then you factor in THIS type of white HOT heat, bro. Unbelievable. USC blows all 9 of these others away, respectively. Sometimes, you simply are comparing apples to oranges.


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